These past few days have been quite amazing. God is definitely doing some work on my heart and the hearts around me. I feel like everyday is God lead. Don't get me wrong it's hard, but it's completely rewarding when someone accepts the gift of the Word of Christ we are offering. We have met people from all over West Africa, and heard so many different languages amongst each tribe it's sometimes hard to distinguish the difference. Before I go on any further I really wanted to share what God's been doing in my own heart.
Last Friday we were in the Bronx for the day passing out the DVDs. This was going to be a short day for me because two other girls and I were going to a small in home bible study in the South Bronx. We had started up Burnside looking for African businesses or vendors we could talk to. As we turned the corner I noticed a small Mosque down the street, so I motioned toward it and mentioned it to the other girls. As we walked by I got a small glimpse inside and noticed the large amount of people that were already gathering outside the door as well. There were men in lines preparing their mats for prayer and their young sons right next to them. My leader turned to me and said 'My heart aches seeing this.' Right then and there I began praying, and the phrase 'Break my heart for what breaks yours, Father', came to mind. It was as if Christ himself were telling me 'My child, this is what breaks my heart. Seeing my people pray to a god that doesn't exist. Kaitlen, this is why you are here. This is why you exist, to make my name known & show my love to all. So many emotions where going through me by this point. I began to think about how I came to Christ. Yes, I was born into a Christian family & yes we went to church every Sunday. But, I was never told that I had to be a Christian or I will be disowned. I got the opportunity to choose for myself. Most Muslims are born into the religion & from that point on live their lives to be the best Muslim they can be to get to heaven. If a one point they decide to convert to another religion they are disowned by their family, cast out of their village or area of living, and in some cases a death threat is put on their lives.
I have song the 'Hosanna' by Hillsong United numerous times and never has it meant so much as it did that day. I continued to pray as I was walking down the streets for the next 15 minutes. God put something heavy on my heart. He told me that the last few days I was in New York were to be spent giving 100% of everything I am. Christ told me to not hold back from what He had to say through me. The sleep and rest would come later, He had great plans that needed to be brought to life. I can't tell you how unbelievably amazed I was that seeing the people praying with my own eyes, opened up my eyes and the eyes of my heart to what God was trying to tell me the whole time.
God is an amazing God! The devil since then has tried to attack me spiritually and emotionally, but I've learned to bring it all to Christ. To lay my burdens at His feet & say I give you all the control. The devil must not have like that because he then started attacking my physically. One night I was having the worst stomach pains, & couldn't be more then 2 minutes away from a bathroom at all times. Then I got a rare skin rash from the sun that lasted a few days. And finally my migraines that I had before the trip started to return. I must say through the pain of it all I just laughed, because I knew this all was an attack from Satan. I would just lift it up to Christ, and when ministry time came I was ready to go pain free. If this doesn't convince you God is in control, then I don't know what else to do.
I serve a great & mighty God!